Its 4:47am in the morning and I’m inside my room with one desk lamp on trying to read. I don’t know, just suddenly want to be sure of my existance, so I’m typing this blog just to show to myself that I’m "alive". Life is full of happiness, but with the same weight of misery to balance our lives. I don’t know how to "以最好的心情去面對最壞的事情", since I see my life pessimisticly. I admire those people who can be so optimistic and be happy all the time. I want to set myself back on track with my emotion, since I’m starting to like the emotion of "sadness". I know, so many people have been telling me to be more optimistic and don’t be upset. But I can’t help it. Is I can’t help it a reason? Or just an excuse for being the way I am? I’m out of control. What is the purpose of life? Can anyone who is reading this tell me the purpose of life? Or at least the purpose of my life? Is there a reason why anyone of us in this world is born? Am I born because of I need to find someone? Be with someone? Be annoy others? Be angry with someone? Can I have a definate reason to why am I here? I’m talking nonsense again. I’m hopelessly lost!!!!! I don’t know what to write any more and its 5:00am now. Should I get some rest? Since I’m going to meet with Arthur and Richard in 5 hours time. Just want to say….I’m still alive and I’m still breathing. That’s all….good bye.