Purpose – aim – goal

I’ve been typing and deleting. Why is it so hard to even put down my own thought? Maybe even words cannot express how I’m feeling right now. I feel dull. Every day repeating similar routine with half of the time burying myself in front of monitors for work. I see the logic of working; to support my necessities and random craves of shopping online. Now though, I just want to take a step back and to breathe again.  Maybe it’s my poor quality of sleep talking or that I’m piss off because my sister said she shower first when I already got up from my chair. I’ve been trying to tell myself every day recently to just be happy and think positive. I hate anything negative that’s coming out from others’ mouths. I want to surround myself with positive energy. However, I can’t lie to myself that I’m sad now. Mood swing maybe? Not sure. I don’t see a goal that I need to achieve or anything to aim for.

I don’t know…..I really don’t know….

I want to go to travel. I want to go to Japan, I want to go to Egypt, I want to go to Thailand…many many places I want to go. If it’s only as easy as packing my bags and go.